“Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create.”
-Roy T. Bennett
I have a friend that always worry. She worries about everyone else’s problems including her family, friends, the world problems, and her own problems. She is super nice, but I know that it is tough on her mental health worrying all the time. I used to worry, I would stress myself out about everything and everyone problems. I would constantly be in a depressed state of mind that it was affecting my wellbeing and happiness. My happiness is important to me and when I was worrying, I didn’t realize that it was taking a toll over me. My friend is sweet, and I love her dearly, but I also must tell her to not worry so much. She always tells me it is not that easy, but it truly is. When I realized the damaging effects, it was doing to my mental health I quickly started working on my worrying habit. I researched the damaging effects of negative thinking, worrying, stress, and a lot of other habits that causes a strain on our mental health.
Our mental health is important and sometimes we don’t realize how our habits affects us daily. One bad habit can be damaging to your whole body. Our body needs balance, you may think you’re healthy because your physical health is in good condition but if your mental health is failing then you’re not healthy. We must take care of our body as a whole.
This month’s focus is on balance. Balance in all areas of your life including your physical health, mental health, relationships, finances, career, etcetera. You must take care of all areas of your life to have true freedom. When your finances are not what you want them to be then you are more likely to stress, but if you are working on ways to improve them this is where you will move toward finding balance in your finances. If you’re having trouble in your relationships with a partner, a friend, or a family member you must fix those relationships. Talk to the person and establish a middle ground then if you decide it is best to walk away then at least you tried but you do not want to carry that burden of imbalance from a struggling relationship. Sometimes we try to move on, but you must make amends with your past to move towards your future. If you’re not in the position to speak to the person then decide within yourself that you forgive that person and you will no longer ponder the things, they done to you and then decide to move on. This might seem like a difficult task but when you set yourself free from the past you will feel a weigh moving off your shoulders.
I carry my stress in my shoulders so when things upset me or if I’m thinking about a situation then I feel my muscles tense in my shoulder and after carrying it for so long they start to hurt. So, I must release that tension in my shoulders by deciding to forgive and move on from the situation. Sometimes we don’t realize it but stress and worrying can cause physical pain to our body that’s why it’s important to eliminate these habits. I know that there are times in life when we may stress and worry but when you start acting these feelings will quickly fade.
My motto is “if you can’t change the situation then don’t worry if you can change the situation then don’t worry,” the bottom line is worrying should never be an option. If you can’t change the situation worrying won’t change it either and if you can change the situation then change it but don’t worrying while you’re working on changing it. According to Wikipedia worrying “refers to the thoughts, images, emotions, and actions of a negative nature in a repetitive, uncontrollable manner that results from a proactive cognitive risk analysis made to avoid or solve anticipated potential threats and their potential consequences.” So basically, worrying is what our body does to protect us, no one likes to change, so the body tries to protect it when something seems different. Change is different, but necessary for growth. If you want to grow and become the person that you always wanted to be it will take getting uncomfortable.
So is eliminating worrying hard, yes and no. It may seem hard in the beginning but if you work on it then it will get easier. When you worry start asking yourself questions such as, why am I’m worrying about this? Will worrying about this help me in this situation? Or will it hinder me from figuring out the solution? You must change your brain physiology to make it approach things differently. Our brain only does what we allow it to do so you must train it to think in a way that is positive for your life. Feed it with good habits and it will use those for future situations. So, as you go about your day remember that worrying is detrimental to your soul, it damages your mental, and your physical health. It causes illnesses to the brain and it ruins your overall mood. If you need help talk to someone you trust to see if they can help you cope. If you do not have anyone to talk to check out my life coaching one on one session to see if I may be of assistance to you.
This month I want you to focus on balance. Look at areas in your life that are imbalance and figure out what need recalibration. If you are already living a balanced life, then that’s amazing keep up the good work.
“Worrying is carrying tomorrow's load with today's strength- carrying two days at once. It is moving into tomorrow ahead of time. Worrying doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”