“Eventually people will realize mistakes are meant for learning not repeating.”-unknown
Have you ever found yourself repeating the same mistakes due to poor choices? If you find you’re in the same predicament every month or every year then your life is stuck in a cycle. Most people don’t realize it when they make choices because we’re all just getting by sometimes. Our choices are often not thought out, we often just go with the flow.
When we’re not conscious of our choices which leads to poor judgement calls. Most people want to break the cycle but don’t know how. No one wants to keep finding themselves back in the same situation. I know I don’t. When I felt like I was stuck in a cycle I tried a different approach to the same situation, but I still couldn’t figure out how to fix my issues. It’s easier for everyone on the outside looking in to see how to fix our issues but it takes us stepping outside of ourselves to figure out what we need to do next.
Part of breaking cycles requires us to be honest with ourselves. When I was making choices that lead to unpleasant outcomes, I had to accept that maybe I didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t have to go scream it to the world I had to just acknowledge it. Once I accepted ownership for my situation then I started looking for ways to fix it. If we’re not honest with ourselves, we can’t fix our issues which is the reason why most people find themselves in the same predicament.
I started listening to advice. Not all advice is good advice but listening to others is important because it can teach you something. Someone that might have made the same choices as you can give you advice on what helped them. My mom, teachers, and colleagues from work have given me advice and if I wasn’t willing to listen then I would have missed the message.
Ask for help. Asking for help is important especially if you want to stop repeating the same cycle. Sometimes you must put your pride aside to allow someone else to help you with your issues. We all want to have it together, but we don’t always have the right answers. Yes, sometimes it requires money, but you must be willing to invest in yourself. A mentor or counselor can be helpful in helping you with your issues because this is what they do professionally. Though it might cost for this type of service at least you know that you are paying for something that will be beneficial to your life. I prefer talking to a stranger because often sometimes our family put this pressure on us to have it together. So, to avoid hearing a long speech on why I should have my life together I rather talk to someone who can show me what I am doing wrong and tell me how to fix it. My teachers from college were my go-to for various advice and most teachers are willing to give advice. You just must be willing to listen.
When we find ourselves constantly in the same situation as we were a month or a year ago from today, we don’t need any outside sources telling us we are a failure. We know that already. That’s not going to help us figure out our issues. The reason why people don’t like asking for advice is because people can be cruel. I had to learn who were the right people to ask for help. No one has it together all the time, but people make us feel like crap for not having it together. No one wants to keep finding themselves in relationship after relationship or in a financial crisis. People genuinely want to fix their issues but most of us give up when we have exhausted our solutions. We don’t have anyone in our life to show us what to do so we just quit. We accept our life for what it is and don’t strive to want more.
I want to encourage you if you feel like this don’t give up. You don’t have to repeat the same cycles of your mom or dad. They are not yours. You are different. You must want greatness for yourself, but you must be willing to work hard for that greatness. Learning how to stop making the same mistakes is going to require you to stay focus. We can’t engage in the same habits or complete the same routines. Our whole life must look totally opposite from what it is now and that is going to require making a change. Sometimes the change must be drastic but it’s worth it in the end.
So, remember today stop allowing yourself to continue to repeat the same cycles in life. If you want to make a change in your life you have to learn to listen, ask for help, and change your habits. This is the only way you can break the cycle.
“I refuse to live behind excuses. If your past was tough work, make your future better. Do not repeat the same mistakes, whether they are yours or someone else’s.”-unknown