I have tried multiple things in life, from careers to startup businesses to ideas about startup businesses but I couldn’t figure out what I was passionate about. There are so many people who look like they have it figured out and are living these awesome lives doing the things they enjoy. Some knew at a young age and some didn’t figure it out until they were older. Besides all of that I was still stuck with trying to figure out what was my purpose? What am I meant to contribute to the world? I would get so frustrated just thinking about how frustrating it is to answer this question. Why was it so difficult for me to figure out my passion? That’s when the journey of self-development began. I started listening to podcast and watching successful people tell their story as a way to help me stay motivated to find what I really supposed to be doing with my life. I always thought you work somewhere and make enough money to pay your bills, go on trips, and spend time with your family. That’s it. This is true but it did not mean that I had to have a traditional job. The plan was graduate from high school, go to college to get a degree, then enter the job field. Simple right?
As I looked at the programs on the college application, I was confused on what I wanted to do. I wanted to be a nurse, radiologist, Health Unit Coordinator, Medical Assistant, Acting, Electrical Mechanical Engineer, yes, I tried all these fields. I did well in all my classes, but I would often question myself about the limits of these careers. How far can I go in each career to have the type of lifestyle I wanted. I thought that these were good career to say you have. Plus, the engineering field and medical field is helpful because we need these types of people, acting was fun but I looked at it as a hobby. There are people who are passionate about these careers, but I wasn’t one of them. I changed my major for the last time and when I changed it the advisor said this is your last time changing it or the college will not allow you to apply for any type of school funding, so make sure that you are okay with this program before you make the switch. I got irritated by this remark because who was she to tell me I had to stop switching, my grades were good, I was just confused about life. The truth of the matter is she was right, I cannot keep switching fields, I had to make up my mind on what I wanted to do with my life. So, at that moment I had to ask myself was I okay with it? Truth is I wasn’t, but I still made the switch. Why wasn’t I okay with the switch? Why was I Having such a difficult time deciding what I wanted to do? Was its fear? What was holding me back from making a decision? It was me. It was me who was getting in the way of me achieving the things I wanted in life, but I didn’t want to admit it.
I knew it was me but why was I allowing myself to limit my success? Of course I do believe the things we go through in life shape and mold us into the person we are and they can also create barriers that hinders us from become our greatest self but I do believe you can overcome any obstacle and stigmas about who you are and who you should be. I couldn’t think of the reasons why I was behaving the way I was at the moment, but I knew that if I kept behaving in this way I would continue to be stuck. I finished my degree and it was so invigorating. I cried, I smiled, I laughed, it was a great feeling. Now what’s next? I thought once you finished you will have a job and everything will be set, yes this is oblivious thinking, but I thought that a light bulb in my head would alert me of my next steps. It never did, so I tried a bunch of things and failed miserably and found myself back to square one. What is my passion? No one told me that life would be this difficult, indeed it can be, but I now know that we make it a lot difficult than it should be. I started back listening to speakers and watching videos of people doing what they enjoy because this is the only thing that kept me motivated.
Then one day everything clicked. I was listening to Les Brown speak and I don’t remember what he said that got me thinking about my life, but at that moment I realized that I needed to start working on my passion. The rate of my success was dependent upon me, will I find myself in this same predicament as I was last year. The decisions I make will determine my outcomes. What I choose to do and what I chose to not do. These will be reflected in how my life turns out. It burned knowing this but if you think about it, it’s so true. There are tons of things that I enjoy, but I had to ask myself what are you passionate about? So, I thought about the things that I enjoyed, and I analyzed each one of them. I peeled apart the hobby and dissected it to see which one I like for leisure and which one I could not stop thinking about doing. That was the moment I realized what I wanted to do in life. I have a lot of things that I enjoyed but there were few things that I was passionate about and that’s how you discover your purpose. The worst feeling is when you give up on something because it’s too hard, or no one believes in you. I had to make an agreement with myself that I will not give up even if it gets hard, even if I feel like I’m too old, or not good enough. I will not stop until I achieve the things I was meant to do on this earth. As long as I am breathing, I will never stop going hard for my dreams. I said this before but this time it felt different. I knew this was something I was called to do, I couldn’t get the images out of my head of how my future was going to be. I see myself smiling, enjoying life, doing the thing that I was meant to do. Giving up on myself was disappointing but I decided not to stay focused on the disappointments instead I decided to stay focus on the end goal.
They say enjoy the journey on the way there, but you also must remind yourself of what you are shooting for. Write it down. Draw it out. Use pictures and images. There is scientific research that shows people who write their goals in detail are more likely to achieve their goals and 1.2-1.4 times more likely to become successful. When we write down things it helps our brain store them properly, the information travels to the hippocampus and is analyzed, there the brain decides were to store the information, this helps improve the brain encoding process so that it would not be stored in long term memory. I knew this was important, I like writing down my goals, but writing down is the first step, the next step is action, and everything you achieve on that list, check it off. This is how you know you have achieved it, then follow up with the next task on your list. Stay focus, this is something I would struggle with because I often find myself losing focus. When I notice this, I have to quickly redirect my brain to what’s important. I knew that everything was dependent on me putting in the work, losing sleep, sacrificing, but It was okay with sacrificing for something I was passionate about. I always sacrifices for others so why not sacrifices for something that I love and enjoy? The sacrifices I put in today will be paid for later, this is what I have to keep reminding myself. It comes a point in life when you have to say I am tired of breaking promises with myself. Breaking promises with myself was only making me feel worst each day. I am still working on my goals and though I have not achieved what I am working towards it feels good everyday I wake up knowing that I am working towards my purpose. So today I encourage others to do the same, figure out what you are passionate about and don’t stop until you achieve it.
“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”
- Friedrich Nietzsche