I never depended on anything to assist me with driving, at least that’s what I thought. For part of my experience on the road I always drove a car that was basic, it had a radio, A/C, you know the things that everyone must have, especially on a hot summer day. This weekend was my self-care workshop and I normally drive my car that has a backup camera, but I decided to drive my older car. I was leaving the workshop and as I was about to pulled out, I check my rear-view mirror, my outside mirrors, then I checked my display, to check the backup camera. I didn't realize I was driving the car without the camera; it took a few seconds for it to register but I eventually pulled out of the parking spot safety.
In life sometimes we don't realize how things can become our crutch. I love technology and its ability to make my life easier but often we become so dependent on it that when we don’t have it, we don’t’ know what to do without it. We must be able to do things without assistance. If I never knew how to drive a car without a camera then I would have had to learn. That's why I think it’s important for people to leave home when they graduate from high school, only if you can. Learning independence is important for personal development. There are so many adults that do not know how to cook because they depended on a love one to cook for them. There are also some adults that do not know how to do laundry because no one ever showed them because they were never asked to complete the task. Our parents love us, and they mean well, but they often cause us to develop a crutch. Most of our habits, behaviors, and the way we see life is stemmed from how we were raised. If our parents did things for us until we were an adult, then we probably are weak in a lot of areas in our life.
Acknowledge the weak areas and then figure out how you will build yourself up. I love to cook but most of the cooking I learned happened in my adult years. I taught myself and I had assistance as well. If I didn't ask for help or learn then I probably eat out a lot, which is expensive, and often unhealthy. Our crutches are simply things we can’t do or struggle with. Don't be ashamed of them because everyone has something that they are not good at. Be open to your struggles and be honest with yourself if you need help. Acknowledging your struggles and seeking help will help you conquer anything. When we don't acknowledge it then we can't allow our body to accept it and get help. Like the stages of addiction, in life I decided to create the stages of acknowledgement.
The first stage of acknowledgement is admitting you have a problem. Secondly ask for help, third, consider your options for help, for example if you are having trouble with your finances talk to someone in the finance department of your bank. Fourth, monitor your progress, whenever you are working towards something in life make sure to acknowledge the small victories. If you are having trouble managing your finance one way to acknowledge your progress is by checking your savings account to see how you are doing in the savings department, praising yourself for resisting to buy something. Fifth maintain, anything you are working to improve in your life is going to take consistency. You must be willing to do things even when you do not feel like doing it. There have been times when I didn't feel like doing something but the results of doing the task paid off in the end.
So, I encourage you to defeat life crutches. Don't be afraid of change. Courage is deciding to do something despite the outcome. Whatever you are struggling with as a result of childhood experience, life in general, or fear, take hold of that crutch and figure out what you must do to defeat it. When I started cooking, I was nervous, and I sometimes still get nervous especially if it’s a new recipe. In life you must keep practicing something until you are confident. Each time I cook I gain confidence. Confidence make you feel like you’re on top of the world. It’s the best trait you can have, and I encourage you to be bold, be beautiful, and confident. Take on life’s crutches and don’t let anyone get in your way.
“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.' You must do the thing you think you cannot do.”
- Eleanor Roosevelt, You Learn by Living: Eleven Keys for a More Fulfilling Life
5 Stages of Acknowledgement by An Inspiring Woman
Admit you have a problem
Ask for help
Consider your options for help
Monitor your progress